I'm so done with...
this school year
504 reviews
Quest Diagnostic (I'm not paying for blood work that you lost and never got to my doctor. Oh the rep agrees and has told me three times that it's been taken care of...clearly it has not!)
this blog (I have nothing positive, funny, encouraging, or inspiring to say. And I refuse to make this blog sorrowful and depressing. Who wants to read that? I don't want to write it. This will be the extent of negativity, my griping.)
Ugghh can you say bad mood city?
I need a vacation! Maybe I'll start posting recipes again.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
Happenings
Okay, I know you guys have missed me.
I miss my blog too. The truth is, I've been so exhausted that I haven't had any time to write anything, well anything blog-worthy.
Why is that you ask?
Because as the TAKS coordinator of our campus, we administered approx. 1760 different TAKS subject tests last week. I know, I know, I'm a big deal.
I can count answer documents and make sure teachers bubbled the "S" in the score code field.
No seriously, it is a TON of work, and now I can get back to some counseling (I mean 504 meetings). The spring is no bueno!
Anyway, what else has been happening.
BIRDS!!!
I absolutely hate birds. Ever since that horrible day when I was walking on campus as a freshman. Oh my beloved UT! I had my new Jansport colorful backpack on, and I was cruising by Littlefield Dormitory (oh how I loved being a Ladybug) and I did the unthinkable. I thought a really nasty thought about that nasty grackel bird patrolling the sidewalk. I thought to myself, "What an ugly creature? And they just look so stupid with their beady eyes." Well you'll never believe what happened.
It.jumped.on.my.back.
I'm.not.kidding.
I screamed and threw off my backpack violently. Sorry laptop computer!
This was out of control. I started crying and breathing really heavy. People probably thought I got attacked by an invisible man. I was a little disappointed no one bothered to come ask me if I was okay or push the campus police call button for me.
I'm sure they were in shock, and I felt the need to give the "don't think ugly thoughts about birds" speech to warn others of the perils of such a risk. But I was just a scared and embarrassed freshman.
So birds and I do not get along. Mainly the black grackels. I love to look at birds as long as I'm behind glass or maybe in a lush tropical rain forest. Don't get me wrong, some are kinda cute. Hummingbirds and those little bitty ones are cute. Pigeons and grackels are...wait no ugly thoughts because bad things happen...see above.
One of the items we got from Granny's house is her bird feeder. No one loves watching birds more than Granny. I'm not sure why Randy requested it because let's be honest, bird food costs money. And Randy doesn't like to spend it.
Well he hung the bird feeder proudly in our back yard next to the dining room windows. He loves to watch them feed from it. I love how they fly into our windows and scare the tarnation out of me.
I think the bird feeder is about to go away.
2 reasons...
1) Randy: "Man, those little birds are bottomless pigs. They're eating us out of house and home."
I know that 3 dollar bag of bird seed ADDS up!
2) Mopac is in love with their dribbles. Randy wouldn't have to fill it so often if they weren't such sloppy eaters. Half, no 3/4 of their food ends up on the ground.
And Mopac eagerly awaits their crumbs. See, she is used to sitting below people when they eat. She knows this is her best opportunity for a free hand out. She has a permanent spot under Randy's chair during dinner.
How do we know she's guilty?
Randy shoots the water hose on her poop.
I'm.not.kidding.
Who does this?
He says it breaks down the poop and acts as a fertilizer for our grass.
That's just gross.
How do I know she's guilty?
I caught her red pawed today licking her lips under the feeder.
I gave her the whole, "Dogs don't eat bird food" speech.
I also should warn her about thinking bad thoughts about birds. The moment one of those things jump on her back, that feeder is gone!
I miss my blog too. The truth is, I've been so exhausted that I haven't had any time to write anything, well anything blog-worthy.
Why is that you ask?
Because as the TAKS coordinator of our campus, we administered approx. 1760 different TAKS subject tests last week. I know, I know, I'm a big deal.
I can count answer documents and make sure teachers bubbled the "S" in the score code field.
No seriously, it is a TON of work, and now I can get back to some counseling (I mean 504 meetings). The spring is no bueno!
Anyway, what else has been happening.
BIRDS!!!
I absolutely hate birds. Ever since that horrible day when I was walking on campus as a freshman. Oh my beloved UT! I had my new Jansport colorful backpack on, and I was cruising by Littlefield Dormitory (oh how I loved being a Ladybug) and I did the unthinkable. I thought a really nasty thought about that nasty grackel bird patrolling the sidewalk. I thought to myself, "What an ugly creature? And they just look so stupid with their beady eyes." Well you'll never believe what happened.
It.jumped.on.my.back.
I'm.not.kidding.
I screamed and threw off my backpack violently. Sorry laptop computer!
This was out of control. I started crying and breathing really heavy. People probably thought I got attacked by an invisible man. I was a little disappointed no one bothered to come ask me if I was okay or push the campus police call button for me.
I'm sure they were in shock, and I felt the need to give the "don't think ugly thoughts about birds" speech to warn others of the perils of such a risk. But I was just a scared and embarrassed freshman.
So birds and I do not get along. Mainly the black grackels. I love to look at birds as long as I'm behind glass or maybe in a lush tropical rain forest. Don't get me wrong, some are kinda cute. Hummingbirds and those little bitty ones are cute. Pigeons and grackels are...wait no ugly thoughts because bad things happen...see above.
One of the items we got from Granny's house is her bird feeder. No one loves watching birds more than Granny. I'm not sure why Randy requested it because let's be honest, bird food costs money. And Randy doesn't like to spend it.
Well he hung the bird feeder proudly in our back yard next to the dining room windows. He loves to watch them feed from it. I love how they fly into our windows and scare the tarnation out of me.
I think the bird feeder is about to go away.
2 reasons...
1) Randy: "Man, those little birds are bottomless pigs. They're eating us out of house and home."
I know that 3 dollar bag of bird seed ADDS up!
2) Mopac is in love with their dribbles. Randy wouldn't have to fill it so often if they weren't such sloppy eaters. Half, no 3/4 of their food ends up on the ground.
And Mopac eagerly awaits their crumbs. See, she is used to sitting below people when they eat. She knows this is her best opportunity for a free hand out. She has a permanent spot under Randy's chair during dinner.
How do we know she's guilty?
Randy shoots the water hose on her poop.
I'm.not.kidding.
Who does this?
He says it breaks down the poop and acts as a fertilizer for our grass.
That's just gross.
How do I know she's guilty?
I caught her red pawed today licking her lips under the feeder.
I gave her the whole, "Dogs don't eat bird food" speech.
I also should warn her about thinking bad thoughts about birds. The moment one of those things jump on her back, that feeder is gone!
Way, I mean way, way, way pumped!
My favorite book becomes a movie! I am so giddy; it's kind of ridiculous!
Friday, April 22, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Rock, Scissors, Cockroach?
Randy is such a stink.
We ran out of dog food today. Poor Mopac, she looked at me like I was crazy when I only gave her one scoop instead of her usual two.
So, the loser of rock, scissors, paper had to go to the store tonight and buy her some more dinner.
Well...not to brag, but I am awesome at r,s,p.
And I was about to take the game over when Randy pulled a new one on me.
STINK BOMB!
Wait, what is that?
It's a rock with your thumb sticking out.
Umm...I don't know which playground he was at when he learned the game, but clearly he's been misinformed.
He explains that stink bomb destroys everything.
So naturally I pull the ole' stink bomb on the next round.
Naturally, I "lose."
How is this possible if it beats everything?
Oh it's because he does some silly walking/crawling gesture that he claims is a cockroach. Cockroaches apparently survive the stink bombs.
Then came the foot. (not me giving him one, but him claiming this foot motion defeats cockroaches)
Then came me saying, "I'm not going to the store."
Penny wins!
I love this new game!
We ran out of dog food today. Poor Mopac, she looked at me like I was crazy when I only gave her one scoop instead of her usual two.
So, the loser of rock, scissors, paper had to go to the store tonight and buy her some more dinner.
Well...not to brag, but I am awesome at r,s,p.
And I was about to take the game over when Randy pulled a new one on me.
STINK BOMB!
Wait, what is that?
It's a rock with your thumb sticking out.
Umm...I don't know which playground he was at when he learned the game, but clearly he's been misinformed.
He explains that stink bomb destroys everything.
So naturally I pull the ole' stink bomb on the next round.
Naturally, I "lose."
How is this possible if it beats everything?
Oh it's because he does some silly walking/crawling gesture that he claims is a cockroach. Cockroaches apparently survive the stink bombs.
Then came the foot. (not me giving him one, but him claiming this foot motion defeats cockroaches)
Then came me saying, "I'm not going to the store."
Penny wins!
I love this new game!
Monday, April 11, 2011
Food Lovers Unite
I love food. I'll admit it! I love food.
Let's be honest. It's good. It makes me feel good.
I have never subscribed to that whole silly notion of "Eat to live and not live to eat."
Whatever! Life would suck if I didn't have food.
So I know this post makes me sound like the perfect candidate for "Overeaters Annoynmous."
Here's my disclaimer...As I'm getting older, it's not as easy to enjoy food as carefree as I once did. You can ask Mopac about our never ending walks. Man, and I hate looking at pictures thinking, "I wish I was that size again." When in fact, I thought I was a heifer in the photo. Gets me every time. Never satisfied with the way I look. So that's why Mopac and I are great exercising buddies.
I can easily thank my parents for my love of food. My parents have a garden that is about an acre. I remember when I was little helping pick sweet corn with my dad. He'd pull the shucks off, and I'd take a big juicy bite right smack dab in the middle of the field.
And my mom is a phenomenal cook! Sunday evening dinners always involve multiple meats and about 8 sides. I'm not exaggerating.
And my brother is a professional chef. Like an important one at the number 4 country club in the nation. He makes things that sound disgusting like duck and animal mousses. But trust me, you can't go wrong with his meat loaf.
That Bayer family is a food family.
Randy always tells me that I'm the fourth best cook in my family. Umm there are only four of us. Truth be told, he's right! Man, I hate when that happens!
My food obsession involves...
watching Food Network whenever I can
reading cookbooks for fun
cooking/baking/pretending I'm on the Next Food Network Star reality show
subscribing to the following magazines: Everyday with Rachel Ray, Martha Stewart, and the Food Network magazine
pronouncing the names of pastas like Giada de Laurentis does
and this is going to sound really creepy, but sometimes, oh I'm embarrassed to admit this, I talk when I cook like I'm actually on my own tv show...gasp!!!!
I'm such a loser!
I can also tell you the best restaurants to eat at...Randy is most proud of this one since he pays for our eating out habits.
Here is a short list I mentally compiled when Randy's uncle from Denver stayed with us.
Best Tex-Mex: Matt's El Rancho
Best Tacos: Taco Deli (the cowboy is my favorite)
Best Sandwiches: Hoody's Subs (Rudino's is a close second)
Best Italian: Mandola's
Best Burgers: Moonie's Burger House (Phil's Ice House is a close second)
Best Pizza: Brooklyn Heights Pizzeria
Best BBQ: Rudy's
Best Salad Bar: Central Market Cafe
Best Ice Cream: Amy's
Best Desserts: Cheesecake Factory (going with a chain here, but who can deny their cheesecake?)
(I don't like seafood nor Asian cuisine, so I can't help you out there. I can't give a fair rating for down home, comfort food because my mom can make it so much better than any Austin restaurant.)
Any favorites? We can have a foodie feud!
Let's be honest. It's good. It makes me feel good.
I have never subscribed to that whole silly notion of "Eat to live and not live to eat."
Whatever! Life would suck if I didn't have food.
So I know this post makes me sound like the perfect candidate for "Overeaters Annoynmous."
Here's my disclaimer...As I'm getting older, it's not as easy to enjoy food as carefree as I once did. You can ask Mopac about our never ending walks. Man, and I hate looking at pictures thinking, "I wish I was that size again." When in fact, I thought I was a heifer in the photo. Gets me every time. Never satisfied with the way I look. So that's why Mopac and I are great exercising buddies.
I can easily thank my parents for my love of food. My parents have a garden that is about an acre. I remember when I was little helping pick sweet corn with my dad. He'd pull the shucks off, and I'd take a big juicy bite right smack dab in the middle of the field.
And my mom is a phenomenal cook! Sunday evening dinners always involve multiple meats and about 8 sides. I'm not exaggerating.
And my brother is a professional chef. Like an important one at the number 4 country club in the nation. He makes things that sound disgusting like duck and animal mousses. But trust me, you can't go wrong with his meat loaf.
That Bayer family is a food family.
Randy always tells me that I'm the fourth best cook in my family. Umm there are only four of us. Truth be told, he's right! Man, I hate when that happens!
My food obsession involves...
watching Food Network whenever I can
reading cookbooks for fun
cooking/baking/pretending I'm on the Next Food Network Star reality show
subscribing to the following magazines: Everyday with Rachel Ray, Martha Stewart, and the Food Network magazine
pronouncing the names of pastas like Giada de Laurentis does
and this is going to sound really creepy, but sometimes, oh I'm embarrassed to admit this, I talk when I cook like I'm actually on my own tv show...gasp!!!!
I'm such a loser!
I can also tell you the best restaurants to eat at...Randy is most proud of this one since he pays for our eating out habits.
Here is a short list I mentally compiled when Randy's uncle from Denver stayed with us.
Best Tex-Mex: Matt's El Rancho
Best Tacos: Taco Deli (the cowboy is my favorite)
Best Sandwiches: Hoody's Subs (Rudino's is a close second)
Best Italian: Mandola's
Best Burgers: Moonie's Burger House (Phil's Ice House is a close second)
Best Pizza: Brooklyn Heights Pizzeria
Best BBQ: Rudy's
Best Salad Bar: Central Market Cafe
Best Ice Cream: Amy's
Best Desserts: Cheesecake Factory (going with a chain here, but who can deny their cheesecake?)
(I don't like seafood nor Asian cuisine, so I can't help you out there. I can't give a fair rating for down home, comfort food because my mom can make it so much better than any Austin restaurant.)
Any favorites? We can have a foodie feud!
Friday, April 8, 2011
Salesman of the Year!
Oh my! It's been a while. Long time, no bloggy!
I've been so busy dominating TAKS coordination. Duh!!!
Seriously with everything that's been crazy at work, we decided to go ahead and have our popcorn ceilings removed. Oh boy! Was that a fun treat! We had a plastic bag covered play house. The house was a complete disaster. I spent 3 hours cleaning tonight while Randy was partying it up at the Astros' home opener. I'd rather be cleaning, but still I want to complain about it.
I will be spending all day Saturday mopping (again, for the third time), vacuuming, and hauling things back to their designated spots. It looks like the powder monster is still winning the battle as their is a thick film everywhere.
Thank you Uncle Sam for funding the popcorn removal and mini blind repairs. The next project is the loft. We want to turn it into a media center. But we need a new couch to make this all happen.
YAY!!! Furniture shopping!!! YAH!!!! I love furniture shopping!
Furniture shopping with Randy...not so much YAH-ing anymore.
He always puts his frugal pants on when we go to make big purchases. And our salesman didn't exactly help us out.
We found the perfect couch for the living room. It's a leather dual reclining sofa. Ohh la la. This is me NOT bragging, because in order to brag you must have or own the item. We left empty handed.
Why might you ask?
Well apparently our sales guy flunked the "how to sell couches" seminar.
Randy: So do these couches ever go on sale?
oh geez...we are so close to buying this bad boy. In fact, we left the house with a cheerful, "Let's do this!" We went to go buy it not haggle. We already shopped around, sat in a gazillion couches, and even measured with a tape measure. Guess who was nerdy enough to bring a tape measure?
Sales guy: Occasionally
Randy: What does occasionally mean?
Sales guy: Well you see when I first started working here, we would have a big sale one time a year. But now with the economy the way it is, we usually have 3-5 sales.
Randy (only hearing the number 5): So when will the next sale be?
Sales guy: (chuckles) They don't tell us that sir because that would dissuade people from buying.
(Alright so he must have passed one or two tests in his sofa selling training... He's starting to grow on me, but then he pulled this number...)
Sales guy: Here's what I can do.
(Oh boy, he's going to cut us a deal. I'm thinking, "wow, my husband rocks at negotiating.")
Sales guy: I'll add your name to my list of customers to email when we have a sale.
WHAT??????????
What sales person ever uses that line? Don't they want an immediate sale? We were about to fold. And then he pulled that number with the whole emailing business. Do you think Randy hesitated in jumping all over that?
Randy: "Well that sounds great."
Of course it does.
Back to the car with the goober behind us probably selling our email address to every third party he can think of.
Email? Really?
He put our name on a scrap of paper. I'm going to go out on a limb and say it was probably completely unofficial.
2 lessons learned...
1)Don't go furniture shopping 15 minutes prior to closing regardless of what your husband says as he assumes "they'll cut a deal when it's closer to closing time." They're only interested in email addresses at 8:45pm and not selling things.
Way to go sales man! I bet you haven't seen the top of the white board in the break room that's labeled, "top sales people."
2)There's always an opportunity to learn something new about engineering.

Randy was more interested in taking pictures of this drainage system set-up.
I was complaining about the whole email nonsense, when he throws the car in park, jumps out, and says "I'll be right back."
Alright! Way to run in and claim that couch Randy! I just knew that couch belonged in our house!
Wrong!!! He bends down to take pictures and measure something in the concrete.
Geez...
I think I hate furniture shopping now.
I've been so busy dominating TAKS coordination. Duh!!!
Seriously with everything that's been crazy at work, we decided to go ahead and have our popcorn ceilings removed. Oh boy! Was that a fun treat! We had a plastic bag covered play house. The house was a complete disaster. I spent 3 hours cleaning tonight while Randy was partying it up at the Astros' home opener. I'd rather be cleaning, but still I want to complain about it.
I will be spending all day Saturday mopping (again, for the third time), vacuuming, and hauling things back to their designated spots. It looks like the powder monster is still winning the battle as their is a thick film everywhere.
Thank you Uncle Sam for funding the popcorn removal and mini blind repairs. The next project is the loft. We want to turn it into a media center. But we need a new couch to make this all happen.
YAY!!! Furniture shopping!!! YAH!!!! I love furniture shopping!
Furniture shopping with Randy...not so much YAH-ing anymore.
He always puts his frugal pants on when we go to make big purchases. And our salesman didn't exactly help us out.
We found the perfect couch for the living room. It's a leather dual reclining sofa. Ohh la la. This is me NOT bragging, because in order to brag you must have or own the item. We left empty handed.
Why might you ask?
Well apparently our sales guy flunked the "how to sell couches" seminar.
Randy: So do these couches ever go on sale?
oh geez...we are so close to buying this bad boy. In fact, we left the house with a cheerful, "Let's do this!" We went to go buy it not haggle. We already shopped around, sat in a gazillion couches, and even measured with a tape measure. Guess who was nerdy enough to bring a tape measure?
Sales guy: Occasionally
Randy: What does occasionally mean?
Sales guy: Well you see when I first started working here, we would have a big sale one time a year. But now with the economy the way it is, we usually have 3-5 sales.
Randy (only hearing the number 5): So when will the next sale be?
Sales guy: (chuckles) They don't tell us that sir because that would dissuade people from buying.
(Alright so he must have passed one or two tests in his sofa selling training... He's starting to grow on me, but then he pulled this number...)
Sales guy: Here's what I can do.
(Oh boy, he's going to cut us a deal. I'm thinking, "wow, my husband rocks at negotiating.")
Sales guy: I'll add your name to my list of customers to email when we have a sale.
WHAT??????????
What sales person ever uses that line? Don't they want an immediate sale? We were about to fold. And then he pulled that number with the whole emailing business. Do you think Randy hesitated in jumping all over that?
Randy: "Well that sounds great."
Of course it does.
Back to the car with the goober behind us probably selling our email address to every third party he can think of.
Email? Really?
He put our name on a scrap of paper. I'm going to go out on a limb and say it was probably completely unofficial.
2 lessons learned...
1)Don't go furniture shopping 15 minutes prior to closing regardless of what your husband says as he assumes "they'll cut a deal when it's closer to closing time." They're only interested in email addresses at 8:45pm and not selling things.
Way to go sales man! I bet you haven't seen the top of the white board in the break room that's labeled, "top sales people."
2)There's always an opportunity to learn something new about engineering.

Randy was more interested in taking pictures of this drainage system set-up.
I was complaining about the whole email nonsense, when he throws the car in park, jumps out, and says "I'll be right back."
Alright! Way to run in and claim that couch Randy! I just knew that couch belonged in our house!
Wrong!!! He bends down to take pictures and measure something in the concrete.
Geez...
I think I hate furniture shopping now.
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