Happenings

Okay, I know you guys have missed me.

I miss my blog too. The truth is, I've been so exhausted that I haven't had any time to write anything, well anything blog-worthy.

Why is that you ask?

Because as the TAKS coordinator of our campus, we administered approx. 1760 different TAKS subject tests last week. I know, I know, I'm a big deal.

I can count answer documents and make sure teachers bubbled the "S" in the score code field.

No seriously, it is a TON of work, and now I can get back to some counseling (I mean 504 meetings). The spring is no bueno!

Anyway, what else has been happening.

BIRDS!!!
I absolutely hate birds. Ever since that horrible day when I was walking on campus as a freshman. Oh my beloved UT! I had my new Jansport colorful backpack on, and I was cruising by Littlefield Dormitory (oh how I loved being a Ladybug) and I did the unthinkable. I thought a really nasty thought about that nasty grackel bird patrolling the sidewalk. I thought to myself, "What an ugly creature? And they just look so stupid with their beady eyes." Well you'll never believe what happened.

It.jumped.on.my.back.

I'm.not.kidding.

I screamed and threw off my backpack violently. Sorry laptop computer!
This was out of control. I started crying and breathing really heavy. People probably thought I got attacked by an invisible man. I was a little disappointed no one bothered to come ask me if I was okay or push the campus police call button for me.

I'm sure they were in shock, and I felt the need to give the "don't think ugly thoughts about birds" speech to warn others of the perils of such a risk. But I was just a scared and embarrassed freshman.

So birds and I do not get along. Mainly the black grackels. I love to look at birds as long as I'm behind glass or maybe in a lush tropical rain forest. Don't get me wrong, some are kinda cute. Hummingbirds and those little bitty ones are cute. Pigeons and grackels are...wait no ugly thoughts because bad things happen...see above.

One of the items we got from Granny's house is her bird feeder. No one loves watching birds more than Granny. I'm not sure why Randy requested it because let's be honest, bird food costs money. And Randy doesn't like to spend it.

Well he hung the bird feeder proudly in our back yard next to the dining room windows. He loves to watch them feed from it. I love how they fly into our windows and scare the tarnation out of me.

I think the bird feeder is about to go away.

2 reasons...

1) Randy: "Man, those little birds are bottomless pigs. They're eating us out of house and home."

I know that 3 dollar bag of bird seed ADDS up!

2) Mopac is in love with their dribbles. Randy wouldn't have to fill it so often if they weren't such sloppy eaters. Half, no 3/4 of their food ends up on the ground.
And Mopac eagerly awaits their crumbs. See, she is used to sitting below people when they eat. She knows this is her best opportunity for a free hand out. She has a permanent spot under Randy's chair during dinner.

How do we know she's guilty?

Randy shoots the water hose on her poop.

I'm.not.kidding.

Who does this?

He says it breaks down the poop and acts as a fertilizer for our grass.

That's just gross.

How do I know she's guilty?

I caught her red pawed today licking her lips under the feeder.
I gave her the whole, "Dogs don't eat bird food" speech.

I also should warn her about thinking bad thoughts about birds. The moment one of those things jump on her back, that feeder is gone!